Med Glossary, Part 5
"I thought nothing of it."
As in, "I had this pain that shot up from my hip bone to my left ear, and I thought nothing of it, but then I got this tingly sensation in my right pinky so I decided I'd better go to the ER."
What he really means is,
1) I've been worrying about that 5 second pain constantly ever since it happened. And see how swollen my hands are? And what is this coating on my tongue?
2) My auntie just had a stroke, and I don't want to die. The doctor told her there was nothing wrong with her too.
3) On the internet I read that shooting pains on the left side can be signs of a heart attack.
4) I'm out of my Xanax. I fired my doctor last month and he won't refill it.
5) This is labor day weekend, and I have plans. Can I get a work excuse?
Have a great holiday, everybody!
Previous glossary entries here.
As in, "I had this pain that shot up from my hip bone to my left ear, and I thought nothing of it, but then I got this tingly sensation in my right pinky so I decided I'd better go to the ER."
What he really means is,
1) I've been worrying about that 5 second pain constantly ever since it happened. And see how swollen my hands are? And what is this coating on my tongue?
2) My auntie just had a stroke, and I don't want to die. The doctor told her there was nothing wrong with her too.
3) On the internet I read that shooting pains on the left side can be signs of a heart attack.
4) I'm out of my Xanax. I fired my doctor last month and he won't refill it.
5) This is labor day weekend, and I have plans. Can I get a work excuse?
Have a great holiday, everybody!
Previous glossary entries here.
Labels: glossary
posted by scalpel at 1:40 PM
9 Comments:
My auntie just had a stroke, and I don't want to die.
In the case of survival, a stroke concentrates the mind wonderfully, as Doctor Johnson said of the prospect of hanging.
"So keep thinking nothing of it" would be the recommended physician response.
What is this work excuse nonsense? What kind of a job would care about such a thing?
6) My wife was the one who insisted I come down here tonight.
Tired of treating patients, are we?
"It is all his fault", as he points to the cop at the door of the exam room. "The cop hit me over the head with the butt of his gun"...did I mention it was when he pulled me out of a meth house.
We're going to perform a bilateral orchiectomy without anesthesia and your fucking finger won't hurt a bit after that.
It was a privilege to treat you in our Emergency Department and we look forward to attending any further medical needs you might have in the future.
These words scare me!
Two months of no posts, Scalpel would you like me guest write some posts for you?
Post a Comment
<< Home