Quote of the Night
You can't make this stuff up.
A patient who was admitted for vomiting and abdominal pain a couple of hours earlier comes walking back down to the ER, dragging his IV pole, saying that he left a bottle of booze in his room.
Where did you leave it?
"I hid it inside my pillow. Can I go look for it?"
There is already another patient in that room, but the housekeeper didn't find any bottle when she cleaned the room. Was it one of those tiny little airline bottles?
"No, it was almost a whole fifth of vodka."
Sorry, we haven't seen it.
"Well, can I buy another bottle from y'all then?"
A patient who was admitted for vomiting and abdominal pain a couple of hours earlier comes walking back down to the ER, dragging his IV pole, saying that he left a bottle of booze in his room.
Where did you leave it?
"I hid it inside my pillow. Can I go look for it?"
There is already another patient in that room, but the housekeeper didn't find any bottle when she cleaned the room. Was it one of those tiny little airline bottles?
"No, it was almost a whole fifth of vodka."
Sorry, we haven't seen it.
"Well, can I buy another bottle from y'all then?"
posted by scalpel at 9:23 AM
8 Comments:
Wow...where does he think he is?! What an idiot!
Welcome back.
You mean you don't sell vodka in the gift shop?
MMT
Probably wanted you to raid the rubbing alcohol stock in the back. A little under-the-table wheelin' 'n dealin'. He'll give you the Fentanyl patch he didn't tell you about and you give him a case of rubbing alcohol (or, in the case of one of my fmr patients, the alcohol-based cleansing foam).
I wonder what the vomiting and abdominal pain was from? Hm.
Now that's what I call a full service hospital.
Welcome back. I missed you.
Aren't you glad you made it back in time to get that quote for your blog?
Hah, what an idiot. Doesn't he know if we had a fifth of vodka we'd probably be drinking it ;)
So, does the pharmacy keep that in stock, or did you have to send out for it?
He probably was downing the sterile normal saline thinking it was a fifth......
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