Little Boss
"Come on Spalding, open up for the doctor! Please?"
As soon as I walked into the room, I could tell who was running this show. His fierce blue eyes and icy stare revealed that this was a young man who was used to getting his way, even at the tender age of four. Well-coiffed and sporting a stylish private school polo shirt, he was destined to become a CEO someday, if he survived this episode of acute pharyngitis, that is.
In the battle of wills, he definitely had the advantage over his parents. Unswayed by their offers of toys or ice cream, he held his lips tightly closed, unwilling to play their little bargaining game. He already had enough toys to keep him occupied for a few years, I imagine. And he'd probably get ice cream any damned time he wanted it, regardless. Seconds, even.
He'd apparently never come up against the likes of a busy and slightly cranky ER doc though. Sorry little Napoleon, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.
Someday you'll understand.
As soon as I walked into the room, I could tell who was running this show. His fierce blue eyes and icy stare revealed that this was a young man who was used to getting his way, even at the tender age of four. Well-coiffed and sporting a stylish private school polo shirt, he was destined to become a CEO someday, if he survived this episode of acute pharyngitis, that is.
In the battle of wills, he definitely had the advantage over his parents. Unswayed by their offers of toys or ice cream, he held his lips tightly closed, unwilling to play their little bargaining game. He already had enough toys to keep him occupied for a few years, I imagine. And he'd probably get ice cream any damned time he wanted it, regardless. Seconds, even.
He'd apparently never come up against the likes of a busy and slightly cranky ER doc though. Sorry little Napoleon, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.
Someday you'll understand.
Labels: patients
posted by scalpel at 9:10 AM
16 Comments:
Hold his nose shut??????????
Scalpel!! Tell us what you did! The imagination brims with possibilities of what could be done, don't keep us in the dark!
I expect you'd get along rather well with my children's pediatrician. He has always been rather creative at getting challenging children (including mine) to comply.
I want to know the end of this story too.
I try the nice approach first: "Hey, Buddy! I'm here to help you feel better!" Get down on his level, face to face. Try to be calm and reassuring with a gentle voice. Examine everything else first to gain his confidence.
But unfortunately he'd already decided long before I showed up that nobody was looking in his mouth, period. And the CEO doesn't like to be second-guessed. So ultimately you've got to make him cry, and be quick with the tongue blade.
Some parents can be helpful, but these parents obviously were part of the problem, not part of the solution. So two assistants to hold, wrap him in a sheet, and lay him down.
My ears still hurt, and mom is probably still crying. But we got our throat culture, and it was indeed strep. So he got a shot too, because there was no way the parents were going to be able to make him take any medicine by mouth.
This was one big-ass penicillin shot the nurse didn't mind giving. ;D
Should have called for a thoracotomy tray -- think of those big-ass retractors that ratchet apart relentlessly and without mercy ....
Cheers,
Felix.
Ouch, those penicillin shots definitely hurt like heck. (When I worked ER, I would hide them behind my back when entering the room--even for ADULTS, heh!) But for kids, I learned to look out after the shot---because some parents allow their kids to hit nurses after a shot, which always pissed me off. What's with those parents? It doesn't hurt, but it was the principle of the thing...
It's very sad when parents don't know that they are supposed to be the boss in the relationship, imagine what a horrible teenager he will be.
I'm reminded of the South Park episode in which they brought in an expert to deal with the ADHD kids. He talked all new age and then proceeded to beat the shit out of them.
You wrapped him in a sheet??
That's what the veterinarian does to cats who won't cooperate, LOL.
Scalpel, you're my kind of doctor:-)
MJ
"You wrapped him in a sheet??"
Papoose board, I'm guessing?
I have yet to see a papoose board that a kid couldn't get out of. When I worked ER I used to swaddle them in a sheet and hold it tight, and if they still wriggled themselves to the point of endangering themselves or the doc(with scissors and needles coming at them)I'd sit straddle on them. One of the ER docs used to specially request my "vise grip" for just such situations. It worked, too.
Yup, a sheet is all it takes, properly wrapped. The safety of the child is the utmost concern, of course, and caution must be observed at all times.
People who work at dedicated children's hospitals can restrain a kid with a couple of Velcro straps that they'll never escape from. Sadly, I don't have that talent myself.
I'm surprised he didn't try to make a run for it too. I'm doing my peds rotation right now, and it is not uncommon for me to have to recapture escapees from other exam rooms.
Bravo!!
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